weight

I went out for lunch recently with 3 friends. After a very satisfying meal we picked up pastries from the bakery and headed to my house to eat them while playing a game. It was during the game that I looked around me at all these thin girls with the realization that they all just ate the same amount as I did. Yet they all had the bodies considered ideal while I, lets just say, don’t. They are able to eat without a thought, they don’t exercise and while I try to make wise food choices and exercise religiously, I will never be as thin as they are. Which made me think… why am I expected to work to look like their body type? They are built one way, I another. Why is theirs considered superior? Why are men allowed to expect me to look this way? Why do I feel guilty when I eat what they eat freely? I try to stay within a healthy range, and exercise to keep my heart pumping but more than that is just getting caught up with what society has dictated to be right. If my body is unable to process foods in the same manner as theirs why am I looked on as if I did something wrong? I hate that we have all become so weight conscious and that at times I still allow myself to get swept up in the madness. But my daily struggle at this point is not to cut down on high calorie foods but rather to stop caring about its effects.