all in the same place

A friend of mine recently ended a relationship only to be pursued by a guy she had dated previously. She is currently seeing where that goes but doubts it will work out. I complained of not dating in a long time and she responds that she may date more but we are really in the same places. This is a line I hear a lot, usually as a way to make me feel better about my lack of dating. But I strongly disagree. I may end up single and the “dater” may end up single but we are at different points having each gone through what we did. And while not dating can increase insecurities, being in a relationship, even if it eventually fails teaches the single that they are capable of one, of being able to “love” and of being appreciated and admired. We all crave attention and getting it, even for a limited amount of time can do wonders for a girl.